Monday, April 29, 2013

Unfathomable & :(

    As I was sitting in front of my laptop, trying to decide which topic to talk about, my son began crying for his baba (bottle). It was about an hour before his bedtime so I told him if you get the baba, you have to go night-night. Not sure if he really understood but I fixed his baba and sent him to his bedroom. The next hour and a half was spent telling him to go back to bed, No, you can't come out of your room, you wanna sleep in mama's bed and so on.

   Well, he wanted none of the above.

   So, I decide to put the gate up in the hallway and leave his door open while my door stayed shut, I turned the lights down in the house, T.V. is off and all is quiet, except lil man.

{And I forgot to tell you I have a splitting headache because I have a head cold, runny nose, sneezes and am exhausted. All of which is multiplied by 10 when you have a 20 month old screaming. }

   After deciding that he had won this battle, I let the gate down and allowed him to come into the living room to sit down on the couch, he had his blanky in tow. He curled up in the corner of the couch where I always sit, pulled his blankey over him and went to sleep; allowing me to write this blog post.

   The entire time he was crying I was thinking to myself, I wish he would stop crying. Why wont he just go to sleep? What's wrong with him? Is he hurting, he must not be tired, how much longer is he going to scream like this? I know my neighbors can hear him, I'll apologize tomorrow.

Before I let the gate down and allowed him to come into the living room, I thought to myself again, "Is it times like this that make parents harm their children, at what point does it become too much to handle?"
When do they start rationalizing the decision to do whatever it takes to make them stop crying?

At what point do they lose it?

   I believe in disciplinary actions, time out,spanking, etc.,I am also aware that there is a difference between providing discipline and not being able to handle the unbelievable octaves kids can reach when crying.

   I was frustrated, sick, tired, weary but it never crossed my mind to hurt my child, I don't know where that comes from (the ability to hurt the very thing you created inside you). It is unfathomable. It's unthinkable. I don't understand it and don't desire to.

   But someone has to, there have to be people who can help the parents who feel they are at their wits ends. The ones who just need a break, the ones who don't know what to do. The ones who need 30 mins of silence and rest. No bottles, do diapers, no clean ups, no questions, no decisions, no nothing. Just silence........

   If you know someone who might need this, and you are able, give them a break, give them a chance to breath, to take a walk, to get a nap. If you knew your actions might save a babies life, wouldn't you do it. Of course you would, so don't let the old adage, "If I had of known" be something that you say one day.

 ASK, OFFER, INSIST

Call a help line. Most States have help lines for parents. Childhelp® runs a national 24-hour hotline (1.800.4.A.CHILD) for parents who need help or parenting advice.


Just a Thought.........................